My partner doesn't want me to start a business, he is not very supportive at all.

I have decided I am going to explore a business option this year, because of all of the uncertainty of life these days.

I want to have something else aside from my job I can do for a couple of reasons really.

Aside from money I want to explore my creativity a bit.

I am a very keen cakemaker and over the last few months have been quietly trying out my baking on unsuspecting friends and family to garner their real thoughts as to whether I am any good or not.

If I told them my idea, they would probably just say everything was wonderful without really giving me an honest answer.

I took stuff to work, made cakes for family events without being asked and things like that.

I mentioned to partner Dave I would like to branch out and he seems to have a problem with it.

I seem to be getting all the reasons why I shouldn't do it...

Which has hurt me a bit, as I was expecting his full support.

Any tips about how to get around this one please?

I don't really want to give up at the first fence!

Comments for My partner doesn't want me to start a business, he is not very supportive at all.

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by: Jackie

Firstly, congratulations on your idea.

I love it when someone finally has the courage of their convictions to go forward.

So good for you!

You know, actually it is not uncommon to hear this problem, I see and hear it a lot.

And not just from partners and or family members , it is often from well meaning "friends" as well.

When someone goes rogue to do their own thing all sorts of insecurities and jealousies pop up, and it can be quite a shock for many people.

The people they most expected to be happy for them, can often surprise them and not show the positivity they were expecting from them.

And that can be very unsettling, not to mention disappointing.


But back to your Dave and a couple of suggestions


1. Accept he has something going on, don't poo poo him, try to really get to the bottom of why he is being unsupportive. This situation says more about him than it does about you.

Is he worried he won't see you as much, or you will go outside of your circle and meet other people.
Is he worried about you spending extra money or sometimes it is because people feel they are going to "lose their partner"

And without too much generalising here about the opposite sex, sometimes, some men don't like to feel what they perceive as being overshadowed by their woman.

It's a kind of cave man instinct if you know what I mean, and some men just can't handle it.

Some real, deep and meaningful talking is required to get to the bottom of the problem.

Mostly likely it is nothing to do with you.

But talk to him and try to get to the bottom of what is really and honestly, worrying him.


2. Perhaps try and share your plan with someone Dave knows and trusts who can offer him another perspective, say when they are down the pub having a chat watching the football and having a pint.

Having a mutual ally on your side could be really valuable.

3. Try to rise above his negativety mentally (not always easy I know) and find some inspirational reading or keep notes on the fridge or however you want to do it. Find your favourite quote and also write down why you want to do what you want to do.

In a busy life you can stop for a minute and remind yourself of your dream.

4. Try to find outside support who you can go to with your worries, but are not necessarily your friends. A FB group, a local baking group... you get the picture...

I know it is not easiest position to be in, but don't lose heart, talk a lot and often and find a support network of others who you can bounce off, who are encouraging and can help you move forward.

Best of luck and let me know how you get on...xx

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